Weight loss: Update: I have now lost over 200 pounds, signed up for half marathon |
- Update: I have now lost over 200 pounds, signed up for half marathon
- ‘Friend’ used me as deplorable fat friend and now im unusable to her
- Weighed out a portion of chips and DIDN'T EAT THE WHOLE BAG!!!!
- I’ve lost 45lbs and I’m still fat. It’s so frustrating can anyone else relate?
- I went from 130 to 190 in 6 months at 5'7" I'm finally at a healthy weight and idk who else to tell!
- This is the first day of my life...
- I caught myself in the mirror, and bawled because of what I accomplished so far
- Can we talk for a sec about how HARD starting is?
- Maintenance Year 3
- NSV- My weight loss helped me recover from Covid quickly
- Is it too late? (a sad rant to be taken with a margarita rim’s worth of salt)
- Long time listener, first time caller
- 30 Day Accountability Challenge - Day 2
- Goal Weight Reached Sooner Than Expected! How to Maintain?
- I can't get rid of feeling I am doing something meaningless
- What A Difference 1lb makes! (No longer obese)
- Weigh-In Wednesday (Share Your Numbers)
- weight fluctuation anyone?
- [Challenge] European Accountability Challenge: March 3rd, 2021
- SUGGGARR CRAVINGS
- Supernatural VR as a way to lose weight
- Today is Day 3 of my attempt to claw my way out of rock bottom. Succeeded in major weightloss and fitness gains...and then spiraled and undid it all.
- I got diagnosed with - Pre diabetes !! Help please :/
- Daily Q&A Post for Wednesday, 03 March 2021 - No question too small!
| Update: I have now lost over 200 pounds, signed up for half marathon Posted: 02 Mar 2021 05:28 PM PST Friends, I had a lot of feedback from my last post, so I wanted to give you an update. In late September, I had lost 157 pounds in 12 months. Since then, I have lost an additional 45 pounds. At the time, I had just run my first (virtual) 10K race. I am now signed up for a half marathon for April. On Friday, I ran over 10 miles in 1 hour, 36 minutes. I have found that it's harder to keep losing weight. Even as I step up the intensity and length of my workouts, I have found it a little more challenging (but not impossible). My body also looks fat. I have loose skin all over my body, which makes me still feel fat at times. But guys, I have to tell you it's amazing to be down to 218. I still want to lose a little more, and think I still can. I also want to say something about companies like Weight Watchers, Jenny Craig, Advocare and others. I am sure they truly believe in their product. I am sure they work for some people. But I believe they have given people the wrong idea about losing weight. There is a cost of entry to those programs (in some cases, a very expensive cost of entry). It gives so many people the idea that if you don't have the money, you can't diet... THIS IS SO WRONG! Every bit of research out there shows eating a low-calorie, well-balanced diet coupled with regular exercise leads to weight loss. That isn't that hard. I really feel if you just watch what you eat (I have used an app, but pen and paper still works), and compared that to how many calories you burn a day, odds are, you'll become fit. Anyway, thanks for everyone who supported me. Below, I have attached my post from late September: https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/j2z34u/my_weight_loss_journey_1_year_later/ My weight loss journey 1 year laterJune 2, 2019, I waddled my 420-pound body up Clifton Hill in Niagara Falls. My wife and I have taken an annual road trip for our anniversary every year since getting married in 2014. Our 2019 trip was special as it was the first time I had ever spent the night outside of the United States. I had always been fairly athletic despite my size. I played basketball and tennis almost every day growing up. My diet, however, was horrific. I lived off Hot Pockets and ice cream. But exercising every day at least kept me from ballooning as a teenager. Then adulthood came, and the perceived time I had for exercise was replaced with work and chores. Leisure no longer felt like a priority. Walking never felt like a challenge, and the walk from our hotel to the falls wasn't hateful as it was downhill. But returning from the falls, I was gassed. The simple act of walking had fatigued me to the point that I had to stop. I was shameful. I had never really felt "unhealthy" until this point. Shamers be shaming August 3, 2019, was a gut-wrenching day for many of us in the US. That Saturday, I had just taken Jenna's car to get an oil change. We found out her rear brake lights would not work, and it appeared there were electrical malfunctions. We were planning on replacing her car at the end of the year, so leaning of a potentially expensive electrical issue prompted us to decide on buying a new car. When I came home, I heard that there was a massacre at the El Paso Walmart. I checked in with our Saturday person at work, and she was going to need some relief at some point (any one who has worked in breaking news understands how draining these massacres are). After working an unexpected Saturday shift, I went to bed planning on teaching a few classes in the morning and then going to buy Jenna a new car. After briefly falling asleep, I received a text that another massacre happened, this time just 15 miles down the road in Dayton. Having graduated from Wright State and then working at the Dayton Daily News, I had many friends living in that immediate area. My thoughts turned to them as I now had to work another shift, this time in an area I knew quite well. While reporting on the events taking place in Dayton, some of my tweets went viral. Immediately, some of the responses weren't about the shooting, but about my weight. There is this huge tragedy happening in Dayton, and my weight was the issue for some on social media. To be fair to other reporters, this was a new experience for me. For many of my (especially female) colleagues, the vitriol of fat-shamers can be far worse. I am not an on-camera journalist, but for those who are, the shaming can be downright vitriolic. But given the two tragedies going on, it was tough to process this hate I was receiving. A few weeks later, I watched a segment on Bill Maher's show about how there should be more fat-shaming in society. It had me thinking that all of those people tweeting at me during another tragic night in our country were the ones who were right, and who am I to judge them? I decided to get a gym membership. But the very thing that was driving me to get in shape was what was scaring me off. If these fat-shamers are so spiteful online, how much shame will I face at a gym? Last September, I went for a walk at VOA Park in Butler County, Ohio. The loop there is 1.5 miles. I felt so exhausted just going once around that loop. I had enough. I knew I wanted to get into shape. For several weeks starting around late September 2019, weighing over 420 pounds, I started walking as fast and long as I could. The 1.5-mile walk quickly became 3-mile walks. While I wasn't seeing results on the scale, I was feeling better mentally. Shamers replaced with cheerleaders After a few walks, I already ran into a few folks at VOA Park who saw how much of a sweat I was working up, and gave me so much encouragement to keep moving. I never expected to get thumbs up from people. You quickly realize that for every person out there shaming you, there are dozens ready to push you and help you. As the weather turned colder, I finally worked up the courage to enter a gym. And it's true about Planet Fitness… it truly is the "No Judgement Zone." People there were so wonderful. Hearing people say "good work" was a great affirmation that I was in the right place. My time spent exercising prompted me to do a lot of research on how to lose weight, and what I could do to drop weight. There are SO MANY diets out there. Which one is right for me? It seemed the one constant was you have to watch your calories. If you burn more calories than you consume, you'll lose weight. I am pretty good with numbers and statistics, so I realized that this could be a winner. So I decided to go with a 2,000-calorie-a-day diet. Coupled with exercise, I found myself losing weight QUICKLY. In the month of December alone, I lost 25 pounds. I have not put anything in my body that I don't track. I track every calorie I eat. It is a great way to hold oneself accountable. Last December was when exercising no longer felt like a chore but routine. I was no longer "forcing myself" to exercise, and had to force myself to take a few day off for rest. This habit of eating 2,000 calories a day and exercising almost every day simply became my routine, and unlike past diets, it felt like this one worked for me. If I wanted to have a cookie, I could, but I had to make up for it somewhere else. My habit of eating a whole package of Oreos quickly disappeared, however. I have bought a few package of cookies since, but it seems they spoil before I get a chance to finish the container. Then came COVID March 11 started off a good day. My weigh-in had me down 78 pounds since October. I went to the gym and had a good workout on the stair stepper. I then went to work. Our whole world felt like it changed in one night. That evening, the NBA suspended the season, President Trump suspended travel between Europe and the US, and Tom Hanks announced he had the coronavirus. It felt like all of a sudden, the coronavirus was going to have a major impact on our way of life for months to come. Leaving work that night in a bit of a haze, all I wanted to do was stress eat. I got off at an interstate exit and was about to order a midnight McDonald's hamburger. Then when I got to the drive thru, I saw my gym membership dangling from my keys and decided not to undo the effort I put in that day at the gym. So I drove home and opted for a small, more calorie-friendly snack. In the days to come, I decided to workout from home. I found myself doing step aerobics on a daily basis, thanks to my wife finding a fantastic YouTube channel. I am so thankful for Jenny Ford for her encouragement as she is a great step aerobics instructor. Even though I don't do step aerobics as often, I plan on doing more as the weather gets colder. It's a great full-body workout that requires very little equipment. And it doesn't require going to an indoor gym during a pandemic! Becoming a runner At the start of 2020, I thought it would be cool to do a 5K. But I didn't just want to walk one, so I decided if I could go 5Ks in less than 45 minutes, I'd sign up for one. Little did I know the only options for 2020 would be virtual. I never really thought I'd enjoy running. It never appealed to me. In May, I tested myself by seeing how fast I could go at the park. It was the first time I had jogged or walked in two months. I crossed the proverbial finish line in less than 40 minutes. YES! Time to sign up for a 5K! It also turns out running is a great way to burn calories. This started to become my daily routine. It also is such a great way to clear the mind. I put on some music and don't think about work or the ills of the world. This is also where I picked up more cheerleaders. I never truly planned on documenting my weight loss journey. I thought to myself I am doing this for myself, and not those dreaded fat-shamers. But I posted some photos of my first runs, and your support was so overwhelming. It truly motivated me to keep going. On July 3, I ran my first official 5K. Not that I was counting, but my photo from that day had over 200 Facebook likes... more than I got for my wedding. HAHA It was time for a new challenge: a 10K. I completed my first 10K on September 14 in 1 hour, 11 minutes. A few days later, I set my 5K PR at 29 minutes. Let's say beyond the improvement of my physical health, my mental health has improved so much too. I have felt so fortunate to have my health and fitness back during a time that so many are suffering, I decided to organize a 5K to benefit Feeding America. A small group of friends have joined, and we have already enough participants to contribute nearly 2,500 meals to Feeding America. If anyone is interested to join, it is on Facebook as the "Beat COVD, Beat Hunger 5k Fun Run." What's next As I end my first year of diet and exercise, I can announce I have lost 157 pounds. Even at 263 pounds, I am still considered "obese." There is more weight I want to lose as I want to continue doing more with running. I have already started planning on running a half marathon in 2021. Nine months ago, even the idea of doing a 5K didn't feel like a given. I understand losing weight is not as challenging as maintaining weight loss. But I am sure with the constant support I have received from so many of you, I will give it my all in keeping the weight off. One reason I write this is because I have gotten several messages from others saying how my new lifestyle has caused them to get more fit. I can't tell you what it means to be an inspiration to others. Given all of the perceived hate in the world, love is what rules. And I have felt the love from my dear friends and family, especially Jenna! Thank you to everyone for your love and support. You all mean so much to me and I feel so proud that I have been able to inspire others to get out and enjoy the outdoors! [link] [comments] |
| ‘Friend’ used me as deplorable fat friend and now im unusable to her Posted: 02 Mar 2021 03:07 AM PST I was reading through this Reddit and saw all the support and motivation everyone here gives to one another. It made me realise that one of my friends actually really sucks now that i've lost weight. I went from being 165 lbs (75kg) to 110 lbs (50kg) at 5'3 (160cm). It was clear to me that I always was considered the fat, less attractive friend compared to her, but now that i've lost the weight and get more attention, i realise how one of my friends still tries to manipulate me into thinking that it is a privilege that i get to hang out with an 'attractive' person like her. When i'm talking to somebody, she'll come around and mention how I used to be overweight and still eat like a pig, but she's covering it as a joke or 'compliment'. She really used me as the shy and (in her terms) ugly friend to make herself seem better and now that i'm less shy and more confident, she can't use me anymore for that purpose. You guys made me realise that i deserve better than those comments and those people. I hope that, if somebody reads this, you realise that you never ever have to accept this kind of behaviour, regardless where you are in your journey. You are beautiful and deserve happiness; never be dependent on someone that makes you feel shit to uplift themselves. EDIT: omg thanks for the support and the Hugz award!! It's my first award on Reddit and i love how it's on a post where you all are SO nice to me. Sending love !! EDIT 2: thank you all so much for the support!! didn't expect this at all but it shows how great of a community you are to me, thank you 💕 [link] [comments] |
| Weighed out a portion of chips and DIDN'T EAT THE WHOLE BAG!!!! Posted: 02 Mar 2021 01:40 PM PST Chips were my downfall. I was always overweight, but after highschool I moved out from my parents house with ZERO idea of what nutrition was, and into an extremely stressful period of my life. It was also across the street from a corner store. the perfect storm. On average, I'd go through a bag and a half of family-sized chips every day. On top of whatever terrible takeaway dinner I had, and starbucks in the morning. Looking back on it, that is far too much. Seeing people pull out a bag of chips, eat some, then put it into the pantry for LATER was always insane to me. I almost found it funny. Why would you only eat some if you could eat them all??? It quickly turned into a comfort. The crunchiness and familiar flavours calmed me down in the hectic life I had grown into. And I kept going on like that for a while. A few years later, I'm almost 100lbs less and a whole new person, but still I have never sat down with a bag of chips without finishing it. Obviously it happens FAR less often. (Maybe every 2 months when I get suuuper lazy) Last night, I had some calories left over in my budget. My boyfriend popped open a bag of chips and I sat down beside him. I was nervous because I honestly don't trust myself around chips. So I grabbed a bowl, grabbed my scale, and poured out 50 grams of chips. WAY more than I thought I would get, putting it in a bowl makes it look SO much bigger. And I found myself enjoying the chips more when I only had a few of them, vs when blindly shoving my hand in a bag. I felt super accomplished. I FEEL super accomplished. I had my favourite snack and didn't go "off track" for the day, and it completely quenched my craving and I feel more confident around a food I usually overindulge in. Hope everyone has a good day and doesn't eat a bazillion calories worth of chips! [link] [comments] |
| I’ve lost 45lbs and I’m still fat. It’s so frustrating can anyone else relate? Posted: 02 Mar 2021 03:42 PM PST 5'11 24F SW:256 CW:215 I've lost almost 45lbs over the last year going from a BMI of 36 to 29 and while I am proud of my progress and lifestyle changes I have been feeling low this week because even though I'm a whole small child of weight gone I. Am. Still. Fat. My ultimate goal weight is 180 and I am aiming to be 200 by my birthday (in June) and I do understand that slow and steady wins the race - but I just needed to rant about my frustrations with weight loss. I'm aiming to lose about 60-70lbs total (I am extremely tall and at my lowest weight of around 165 I looked too thin for my body so 170-180s is my ideal range) BUT ITS SO ANNOYING GETTING THERE. I just wanted to rant - has anyone who has lost large amounts of weight felt this? Any tips or advice? Thanks so much! [link] [comments] |
| I went from 130 to 190 in 6 months at 5'7" I'm finally at a healthy weight and idk who else to tell! Posted: 03 Mar 2021 01:14 AM PST I'm just really happy with where my body is for the first time in well forever. I was always extremely thin and ppl would call me holocaust survivor or skeletor in high-school and it made me so insecure. I ate, a lot in fact but just couldn't put on weight. Then I met my future husband, hit 29 and put on 60 pounds in about 6 months to a year. It was so bad his grandfather asked if I was pregnant at Christmas and again at his grandmother's funeral. I was mortified, I'd never been comfortable in my body but being heavier was even worse. I stopped caring about what I looked like, wore, stopped getting my hair done etc. My fiance still loved me and was wonderful but I felt so disgusting. I started drinking....a lot. Like a bottle of Amsterdam vodka in 2 days to my self or a whole 12 pack of seltzers. Then I got sick, I couldn't eat anything heavy or drink without vomiting...drs did so many tests and couldn't figure it out. Turned out I had an infected cyst on my ovary leaking bacteria into my abdomen that my stomach was absorbing making me sick. I quit drinking everyday, quit smoking the first time I was admitted to hospital and changed my eating habits/diet and now I've lost 30lbs and losing about 6lbs every 3 months. My goal weight is 150, I'm 163 right now and so proud of myself for the changes I've made. Noone in my life seems to care, they all want to make comments about my weight when I was heavier but now...nothing. So just wanted to share I'm proud of myself for quitting smoking cigs, binge drinking and eating until I passed out. I dyed my hair this week and bought new clothes. Went bridesmaid dress shopping and didn't loathe it like I did months before. I guess I'm just happy and finally feel sexy/happy with my figure and weight. If I can do it anyone can, thanks for being inspiration! That's all, thanks for reading. [link] [comments] |
| This is the first day of my life... Posted: 02 Mar 2021 12:38 PM PST tl;dr After realizing that I haven't healed from YEARS of trauma and the death of a loved one, I am finally ready to give myself the unconditional love and support and friendship that I give to everyone else in my life. It's very scary. I have thought about writing this-and consequently have put it off-over and over for months. I'm not sure why the idea of writing this all out has seemed so daunting, other than perhaps the most obvious answer, which is that it's not an easy thing to do. I want to write about my weight loss goals and the support I'm hoping to find in this community, because I think it could really change the way I view and engage with my ambitions and beliefs about weight loss/ myself. But it feels like I can't do that without explaining how I got here. This may be long winded, but I really hope some of you read this. And I'll do my best to keep it to only the most necessary details. I sat in the doctor's office (where I'm guessing so many of our epiphanies occur) the other day and was going in to meet a psychiatrist. I hadn't expected to get weighed. Weigh ins have long been a source of complete and utter terror/anxiety for me. I am 26 now, and I remember being in middle school and having public weigh in's in PE (which definitely should not be allowed????) and being completely sick over the prospect of it. This is a deep rooted anxiety, which goes far beyond the number on the scale. But more on that later. For now, I'm sitting in the plastic chair of the psychiatrist's waiting room, being told it's time for my vitals to be taken. I understand why it was necessary, but it was a real moment of heartbreak for me. That is something that I have really become aware of in my life-how my complete awareness of my body (and the way it looks and moves and the space it takes up) makes even the most innocuous tasks very emotional for me. I don't have a single moment free from that. I am constantly perceiving the world through a lens that is hyper focused on my weight and my body. It's led to an agoraphobia and fear of places and people that totally contradicts my personality. I'm a super social person and I love being out in the world. But I don't want to be seen. I want to hide. I am….I'm sad. I'm sad. She tells me my weight. 250. 250!!!!! There's freedom in typing that. No one in my life would believe that number. Though this is by far the highest weight I've ever been, a lifetime of masking and over-compensating for my body has forced me to figure out how to camoflauge very well. I'm guessing most people would think I was 180 or so. Now that I think back on being 180 and thinking THEN that I was out of control, it all just makes me feel a little deflated. I sat there, actually very numb, and thought-"It's okay, because this isn't even your body. That's just a number. It doesn't reflect who you are and where you're going." My protective mechanism is disassociation. I learned to do it when I was very young and living with a tragically and dangerously alcoholic parent. I was not abused, but I witnessed my mother attempting suicide, was forced to call 911 for her multiple times by the age of 9, had to learn to deal with her alcohol related seizures, grew up without the love of stable female figures in my early life (I'm a woman, since I failed to mention that earlier), etc etc. I love to write and paly music and act, so I genuinely began crafting fantasies of my future where I would be safe and loved and paid attention to. I should mention here that I have an INCREDIBLE father who has done a remarkable job in raising me. But as a single parent, he worked a lot and I definitely felt unloved and abandoned until I was old enough to understand the sacrifices he made for me. (Late teens, early twenties is when our relationship fully became the solid best friendship it is now. He's my rock, and he honestly is the reason I've gotten this far. Love him SO much.) I always had a lot of friends and was genuinely very loved, so I don't want to make it seem like I was physically alone. I think there was more a deep, deep, feeling of abandonment and unworthiness, having to take care of a parent that young. I couldn't understand why my mom couldn't get better for me. She was a great mom when she was sober, and she was full of love. But her own hurt and pain from her own life got in the way. She was the youngest of 6 kids, born to Hollywood director and actor parents, very beautiful and smart, and she was put into dangerous positions at way too young of an age in the 70's and 80's. super interesting, and I will post about it one day. But her mother, my grandma, was an alcoholic (though she's 55 years sober now! Go Grandma Josephine!) and she was the victim of alot of misjustice. I am not blaming her. But there was so much pain for me from such an early age. She felt very guilty about it, and when she was with me, she'd shower me in gifts and yummy food. Things my dad wouldn't give me. I still remember my first McDonald's hamburger and my first Jack In the Box hamburger when I was in kindergarten. That created the blueprint for the emotional relationship with food I only JUST realized I have!!! Anyway, fast forward through the early years. I became an adolescent with no mom and very little contact with her side of the family. My hips started to grow. My breasts started to grow. My dad did his best, but he was a punk rock guy with a 12 year old girl. He had NO idea how to tell me what was happening to my body. He bought me my first bra and first box of tampons and never made me feel embarrassed, but he also didn't really know how to talk about it with me. (Once again, I totally understand. Lmao. Bless my dad. I still remember phone calls with him from the tampon aisle asking me if I wanted the "blue flavor or the green flavor" which was nervous dad for "regular or super." He's a precious man.) I truly began to compartmentalize. I was happy, in general, and very bubbly and social-but all the while this deep, soul, wound felt as if it was growing and growing. I struggled with weight, but it hurts my heart to think of it, because I was perfect how I was. I was a kid. People have talked about my body since I can remember. I am black/french and Italian, which basically means Black and White, and from the time I was 5 years old, I was aware of how different I supposedly was. When I was 5, I remember playing house with two classmates in my kindergarten class, and there was a discussion of who was going to be mommy, daddy, and baby. It was myself, another little girl, and a boy named Matthew Fuller. I'll never forget his name or his face. I and the other little girl both wanted to be "mommy" (EW at this gendered nuclear family bullshit, btw. It's so gross to think back on how conditioned we are from a young age to place ourselves in these roles and be seen as a wife and mother. UGH...but I digress) but Matthew made the choice. He told me I was fat and my skin was too brown. LITERALLY. THAT IS WHAT HE SAID. I was a baby...he was a baby! But I carried that with me through out my LIFE, man. I really did. And the microaggressions of being a mixed girl with a white mama and a black dad in the 90's and 2000's really played a role in how I saw myself. And by extension, how I treated myself. By my teen years, I felt ugly and fat. I have had the same group of best friends since I was 11. I got SO lucky. They're the best people on Earth. And they are BEAUTIFUL. I'm not just saying that. Like, my friends are incredibly beautiful. And I always felt like I was the funny one, or the smart one, or definitely the artistic one-but that seemed to pale in comparison to always being the one the cute boys wanted to talk to. And again, I want to stress-looking back, it hurts me how hard I've always been on myself. I was beautiful, too. I have always been smaller in terms of bone structure and height. At that time I was probably 5 feet tall or so. And I was around 150 pounds. I have an hourglass figure, so I carried the weight pretty well. But I also was comparing myself to my friends with completely different genetics, and I felt like I was hideous in comparison. It completely changed my life. I had panic attacks before things that were supposed to be fun, like parties and outings. When we were younger, my more neurotypical friends struggled to understand this, and thought it was dramatic of me to decide I literally could not go out if I couldn't find something to wear. But again, I didn't have the tools or comprehension to explain how much deeper it was than just not liking my outfit. I was sexually assaulted at 16 by a close friend. The situation was awful and nobody really understood that rape could happen even if you were drinking and even if it was your friend. My experience was invalidated and ignored. It took a really long time to heal from that. Not sure if I have, to be honest. Feeling unlovable, I then lost my virginity at 17 to my friend's older brother who was much older and was super sketchy. I continued that pattern, of weaponizing my body to combat the voice inside of me telling me I wasn't good enough. The things that happened to me sexually as a result of that still really hurt me. I told no one. I have dedicated my life to being the best friend and daughter I can possibly be to distract everyone from the fact that I am so afraid I will never find my person. I feel so much love for everyone that it feels like my heart is going to explode. But that is also my biggest weakness, because sometimes I feel so much it just hurts. It makes my eyes water writing that. I've thought of killing myself constantly since I was like, 19. My dream was-and is still-to be a writer and entertainer. I want to be able to perform live without fear. I want to be able to act. And yet I feel like my weight is keeping me from my dreams. I know that isn't true. But the idea of failing to achieve my dreams is genuinely worse than death. And sometimes I think it would be easier not to exist. But I know how much it would hurt the people who love me and depend on me. So I never, ever will. I love life so much that it makes me want to die. Because I feel everything so deeply I sometimes can't bear it. My friend died in June almost 2 years ago. He was one of my best friends ever. I loved him deeply. I was always partially in love with him. I even thought one day, maybe, maybe MAYBE we might end up together. He felt like my soul mate sometimes. We met when we were 15 and he died at 24. He was super, super, wounded. In ways I didn't even know the extent of. He OD'ed. He had just gotten out of rehab. I was supposed to take him to a meeting that day. Instead he died. I spoke to him the night before. I still can't think about it. I cry, and I cry and I cry. I love you, J. I miss you. I got a DUI. It was just a really dark time for me. I am SO FUCKING PROUD of coming out of that. My friend was dead and I found myself in the deepest well I'd ever been in. I think that trauma literally changed the chemistry of my brain. Nothing made sense anymore. Couldn't focus. My eating went to hell. I mean….I feel like I lost those 2 years of my life. I don't even remember them. I was in so much pain that I didn't address. Throughout those years, I abused my body, starved it, harmed it, you name it. I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety as well as body dismorphia. I'm pretty sure I have a form of PTSD, but I've never been officially diagnosed. Fast forward to now. I'm 26. I have done so much mental and emotional healing. All of the times I'd tried to lose weight in the past, it was about the physical. It was about a number on the scale. It was about the attention of men. It was about trivial things. Surface things. I never addressed the pain beneath. I never EVER gave myself grace or love or compassion, even though I am an incredibly loving and compassionate person. It just kind of dawned on me the other day, even before the doctor's visit, that I have begun to heal myself in a deep and personal way. I am unlearning my conditioned toxic beliefs each day. I truly love myself. I want a good life for myself. I know how capable and deserving I am. I have handled everything so far-and it can't be for nothing. I am currently working on finishing an album and publishing my second zine of artwork and poetry. I look in the mirror and although I still feel triggered and sad-I know that isn't the objective reality. I AM a beautiful person. And luckily, I'm actually very healthy. I just got a full panel of blood tests. I have no physical illnesses other than PCOS, which explains a lot of my weight gain and metabolism issues. I'm on medication for that as well as mental health meds. I am on medication for my depression and anxiety, which is giving me the motivation to actually get out of bed in the morning. I am LUCKY. I have a father who loves me. Friends who are an amazing support system. I have all of the tools to be successful. I saved up money, quit my job, and moved back home. I am safe here. I have the time and means to eat well and exercise. I am writing and working on my art. I am talking to my mom again, with my own boundaries set. All that's left is this. To care about myself enough to make my life better. To take control over my disordered eating. To be present and actively participate in my wonderful life. I deserve it. We all fucking deserve that!!!!! So. I'm going to do it. It's never felt like this before. I guess, I'm just ready. I'm sure I left stuff out, but I've already written a fucking novel. I'm sorry about that. I needed to get that all out. If you made it this far-you are amazing. Seriously. You had no reason to care, but the fact that you did makes me feel seen. Please, please, engage with me. Let me know if you have any thoughts, feelings, shared emotions, whatever! I truly look forward to the community I can build here, and hopefully it will help me with accountability and encouragement. Lastly, I will show you my starting pictures. I plan to update later, so I really want to have the initial photos here to compare to eventually. There are also some areas I'm kind of fixated on that I hope I can gain a more objective perspective on. Yikes, this part is really scary. But I want to be transparent about this process. I'm just gonna throw in some pictures I took right now....so excuse my crazy hair and blah blah blah. I'm terrified! Wish me luck! My life awaits! [link] [comments] |
| I caught myself in the mirror, and bawled because of what I accomplished so far Posted: 02 Mar 2021 10:19 AM PST TL;DR at the end I, like many of you, struggled with weight issues nearly my entire life. When I was a kid, I was decently fit until around the 2nd grade, where I began to have some slight health issues. Due to my allergies, my doctor recommended to my parents steroids to help accelerate my growth in hopes to phase out my allergies. As a result, I gained a massive amount of weight (and height) extremely quickly. After that, I excepted myself as the "fat guy," and it destroyed my self-image throughout public school and a good chunk of college. I consistent told myself "I'm just not a skinny guy," "there's nothing wrong with being fat," "I love food to much," "I could lose the weight if I wanted to, but I'm good where I'm at," etc. Then 2019 comes around. I'm at my parents place over fall break, and I go and take a shower. I turned and caught myself in the mirror nude, my immediate gut reaction was one of disgust. You know when you don't intend to see yourself in the mirror, and you do, you have a moment when you don't subconsciously think you're looking at yourself? That happened. I was disgusted of myself. I hated myself. I weighed myself and was 249 pounds. I thought about all the things I've told myself, specifically the "I could lose the weight if I wanted to" thought. I wanted to prove that theory, do I have the ability to fix this? This marks the beginning of my weight loss journey. There's been some ups and downs, but I'm currently 185 pounds and shooting for 175 (well more like 11% body fat). However, I still look at myself and see myself as a fatass. I don't know if I have body dismorphic disorder, but I definitely have symptoms of it. However, as I'm getting ready to go to bed last night (I sleep shirtless so I'm shirtless in this moment), I caught myself in the mirror right above my dresser. My subconscious didn't realize I was looking at myself, and my gut reaction was one of envy. The lighting highlighted my arms and my stomach, where some slight abs are beginning to develop. It also highlighted my stretch marks on my side, my upper chest, and my profile frame. I viewed myself as sexy, and fucking lost it. I cried so fucking much. It took me like 15 minutes to stop. I'm so happy I've accomplished this, and I'm not even done. I'll never be done after an experience like that. I want to thank everyone from all the health subreddits (CICO, fasting, 1200isplenty, loseit, progresspics) for a lot of my motivation. I literally have a Reddit account just to view these daily, and the stories a see and read are so damn motivational. I couldn't do it without y'all. TL;DR Caught myself in the mirror, and thought I was sexy. Never viewed myself like this, cried for 15 minutes. [link] [comments] |
| Can we talk for a sec about how HARD starting is? Posted: 02 Mar 2021 03:12 PM PST So I just started cutting again in preparation for summer. I'm not trying to lose too much, and my calories really around that low for my height and activity level (1400-1500). And oh my God, I forgot how hard it is to go from eating maintenance to being in a caloric deficit! Your whole body is like "what the FUCK are you doing right now???" Your hunter hormones are whacky. Your sleep schedule gets disrupted. It's absolutely miserable. But it's just an adjustment period. After about a week things calm down. Your body gets used to it. You stop feeling like you're gonna die. You're no longer hungry all the time. So for anyone who just started and is feeling terrible, know that it's going to get easier! Seriously! You'll adjust. You just gotta make it through the first week. (If it's been longer than a week/week and a half and you're still feeling awful, though, that means something's off. You probably aren't eating enough.) [link] [comments] |
| Posted: 02 Mar 2021 03:38 PM PST I turned 50 last week and have been reflecting on things I've learned in my life — including the realization that my body composition is the result of my own choices. Learning that lesson has helped me make some serious changes to my eating and fitness. https://i.imgur.com/MvLpCCO.jpg (Photo is 2016, 2017, 2018, and today) I joined the r/loseit and r/fatlogic subreddits in 2017. They helped me finally realize that I was 100% responsible for my obesity and that I looked like I did as a result of my own choices. So right before I turned 46 I started making different choices. This May will be the 3 year mark since my "first shirt-off summer in decades.". I've kept the excess weight off and have continued to reach and set new fitness goals. It's still not easy for me, but it finally feels sustainable. I don't do IF or Keto or Paleo. I just eat less than I burn. I'd been obese since my 20s and I kick myself for not starting sooner, but it really never is too late. I still lurk here because reading others' victories and setbacks helps motivate me. And maybe knowing that an old, fat computer geek can do it might help motivate you, too. Don't give up. Be honest and consistent. You CAN do it. [link] [comments] |
| NSV- My weight loss helped me recover from Covid quickly Posted: 02 Mar 2021 06:57 PM PST One year ago in March I started doing CICO and increasing my activity level in the hopes of losing weight. I didn't have a specific goal weight, but I knew that I wanted to be healthier overall. Over the past year I've kept at it and managed to lose 50lbs, and I've also taken up regularly running and lifting weights. Fast forward to 10 days ago, when I found out that I had been exposed to Covid by a member of my household. I quickly developed symptoms, but they never escalated to the point of me needing any medical intervention. I've been on the mend for the past week, with hopefully no long term negative health effects. When I was actively sick, I had a friend who is a cardiologist checking in with me to keep tabs on my symptoms, just making sure that I didn't have any reason to worry about my heart health. I had a very proud NSV moment when my friend told me, "you're such a healthy person, that is really going to help you recover quickly." She called me a healthy person! I was obese at this time last year! Thanks to my weight loss and active lifestyle, I had great cardiovascular health going into my illness, and I'm recovering faster than I ever expected. I'm taking it slow and monitoring my heart rate as I reintroduce exercise into my routine, which is easier to do since I've spent the past year keeping tabs on my heart rate as I've become a runner. I'm happy to be thinner and to fit into cute clothes, but the real reason I needed to lose weight was for my health. I got lucky with my covid experience, but I also got to reap the rewards of my hard work over the past year. I love and am happy to live in this body. TLDR: I caught covid, but I never got very sick. My recovery has been fast, and it likely would have been much worse if I had a higher BMI or if I weren't an active person. I'm grateful for the work I've put in this year to be a healthier version of me. [link] [comments] |
| Is it too late? (a sad rant to be taken with a margarita rim’s worth of salt) Posted: 02 Mar 2021 08:58 PM PST Hi guys. Hear me out- I know everything I'm about to say is illogical, but I need to just express my feelings and (hopefully) get some advice/encouragement that will help me shake this feeling. Obligatory "I'm on mobile" disclaimer. I'm 26f, 235lbs, at only 5'2". I don't usually feel huge unless I need to bend down (squat, kneel) or I see myself in a picture or video (who is THAT?!?!?). I know for the sake of my health, I need to lose weight. For the sake of my health and vanity, I WANT to lose weight. However... I tend to give up on myself. I'm very all-or-nothing about it, and I also sometimes feel like it's too late for me. That I missed the window where change was possible. Since I'll never be 18 or 21 again, what's the point? I missed me peak years. Why try when I've already lost so much time? What if my bad habits have already done irreparable harm to my health? If I might die sooner anyways, why not eat the Taco Bell again today? I know that's crazy. Nothing will ever change if I don't change, and a bad day or moment doesn't mean a bad eternity. I know I'm still privileged- there are plenty of people older, heavier, and in worse health than me that are committed to making a change. I just struggle to remember that and to get myself into the right state of mind to make changes myself. So, fellow redditors, if you have any sympathies, advice, encouragement, or anecdotes- please share them. Edit: fixed a typo [link] [comments] |
| Long time listener, first time caller Posted: 02 Mar 2021 06:36 PM PST Hey all, M32 5'9" SW: 310 CW:290 I've been lurking for a while here having been going through my own challenges with mental health, binge eating disorder, and weight fluctuations. I'm a career firefighter so I am in a "shape" but throughout life have been a constant binge eater. I carry a lot of extra weight around and it makes me feel very inadequate at my job. I often feel irresponsible and unreliable. Daily stress, trauma, and anxiety often take a pretty heavy toll and ever since I've gotten on the job I really struggle with controlling my urge to binge. Over the last year I got covid, double pneumonia, the flu twice, and a back injury, it gave me a lot of time to myself, isolated and alone. Thats what weight loss can feel like to me. I'm writing this because I'm finding more courage in opening up about these things. While I am still overeating, the binging has decreased and if I over eat, it's from relatively healthy choices and quality food (I'm I'm pretty decent cook). I'm not looking to lose weight fast or make huge changes, been there, tried that. What I'm having success with is slowly and methodically choosing to make decisions that want lead me down a negative rabbit hole that ends with a $40 binge at the BK Lounge or whatever weapon of fast food choice that's available. Tonight was close, but I can happily report that I fought off a potential binge and just made myself some tea instead. I so badly wanted to get in my car and go get food, but I was able to stop myself. It almost didn't work, the internal battle is constant, trying to find excuses, allowing permissions of "just this once" or "tomorrow I'm gonna crush it", both deals that I've made with myself. This only set myself up for disaster the next day because I would feel like crapola trying to get out of bed or I'd toss and turn with a stomach ache throughout the night. In order to find why I was craving a binge, I had to go inward, understand that I'm feeling anxious, and remember the terrible feeling that comes after binging...it worked. It might seem like something insignificant for many of you who have had so much success and I truly hope to achieve that for myself. For those of you who struggle every day, lurk, and are overwhelmed by how much work there is to do, these thngs are a huge victory. Do the little things, challenge your old programming, cycles and habits...one step at a time. If you've read this long, thank you for your support and lending me some of your attention. We can all string together healthy decisions and improve our relationship with ourselves and the way in which we treat our bodies! Good luck to everyone else out there ! [link] [comments] |
| 30 Day Accountability Challenge - Day 2 Posted: 02 Mar 2021 05:44 PM PST Hello lovely losers, Happy Tuesday! Weigh in daily, enter into Libra & report here even if I don't like it: No weigh in this morning, 229.9 lbs trend weight. Entering it even when I don't like it. Stay within calorie range (1800): On the precipice of madness kids, TBD. 1/1 days. Exercise 5 days a week: 30 minute lunch walk. 2/2 days. Self-care time (journaling, beauty treatments, anything that fills the bucket, non food rewards): I'm going to address the pile of laundry on my bed for realsies. Try a new recipe once a week: Nothing yet, although I tried the pickled peppers from last month & those need to happen again for sure, with more exciting seasonings & types of peppers. X/4 weeks. Express mindfulness and or gratitude: Today I am grateful for still being up right. That is good enough today! Getting it. Your turn kids! [link] [comments] |
| Goal Weight Reached Sooner Than Expected! How to Maintain? Posted: 02 Mar 2021 10:27 PM PST So, I (F, 29, SW: 158lb, CW: 135lb, GW: 134lb) am about a pound away from my (new) goal weight, yay! My weight loss has mostly been for our wedding in August, and while I'm at the maximum weight I want to be on the day itself, I would like to lose one more pound to allow for birthday celebrations and our wedding cake tasting in April. I've also got two hen do's and potentially another wedding between now and late August; that's a lot of cake and prosecco. My question is, once I've binned this last pound, how do I maintain? I've heard it's harder to maintain than lose, and I'm conscious that April in particular will be heavier than most other months (it's my Mam's 60th and my 30th the first two weekends; our cake tasting the week after mine; and I don't know what the last weekend will look like yet). I've changed my stats on MyFitnessPal and upped my points on WW, but I don't want to lose everything I've worked hard for over the last year. Any tips are greatly appreciated :) [link] [comments] |
| I can't get rid of feeling I am doing something meaningless Posted: 02 Mar 2021 11:51 PM PST 6' 17M CW: 250 GW: 180 I have above average amount of excess fat since my kindergarten days. I had no control of what I was eating, and even had no clue what my problem with health is. That obscurity ended at my age of 14. I was desperate about it and just accepting it with shame for three years. Now, at the age of 17, I've just started to gather any sort of weightloss information. So I figured out my basal metabolic rate, started counting calories, started doing a little bit of exercises everyday. And I have feeling that I do exercises wrong. Every morning I do exercises on my stationary bike. But only for 20-25 minutes. I heard that you have to do cardio for like one hour to have atleast tiny weightloss progress, but even 25 minutes are enough to make me extremely sweaty like never before (like you doused yourself from water bottle) and make me exhausted for 4-5 hours. Even 10 minutes are enough to make me feel uncomfortable but I don't give up until it gives me a pain in my legs. I usually ride near 5.5 miles. I heard from my friends that they ride like 12-14 miles per day at summertime on their own bicycles. And I am now thinking that I workout for nothing. Those exercises make me really exhausted but, as I think, they get me nothing. I think those 25 minutes aren't enoguh to start burning fat to get energy. Maybe it sounds wild to you but I think like that. Anyway, I have done my cardio for today and now I am writing this post to maybe get some advices and help. Please, help me, I am stuck with my thoughts. [link] [comments] |
| What A Difference 1lb makes! (No longer obese) Posted: 02 Mar 2021 07:31 AM PST https://imgur.com/gallery/WtVuAxI Hey All! Long post ahead. I am currently 180lbs (81.65 kg) and am 5'6" (167.6cm), 24F. My starting weight was 240lbs back in June 2017 (I gained the freshman 50 in college) and lost a total of 50lbs in 5 months starting off! I did this by increasing exercise, counting my calories and learning about nutrition. During 2018-2019 I ate mostly keto which I found did not work for me losing weight but instead I maintained. Fast forward to 2020 I was pregnant and went back up to 230lbs. Since having my baby TWO months ago I have officially lost ALL of the baby weight AND an additional 10lbs!! I achieved this by: 1. counting my calories (again lol) 2. Incorporating protein bars/shakes for my sweet tooth 3. Aiming to workout for 1 hour a day (lifting or YouTube HIIT) What I have learned thus far: 1. Focus on one day at a time, I DO NOT think about tomorrow's workout until tomorrow 2. Get it done first and focus on excuses later (mind trick: there will be none because it's already been done) 3. Find motivation when you feel all hope is lost, because that time WILL come and you HAVE to be prepared for it This journey has been LITERALLY filled with ups and downs especially with a new addition to my family but that's apart of life. This community has been a GAME CHANGER for my motivation!! Don't give up hope because although you may think the finish line is far away, every day you decide to make the right decisions for you and your body, you're that much closer. [link] [comments] |
| Weigh-In Wednesday (Share Your Numbers) Posted: 02 Mar 2021 09:01 PM PST Share Your Numbers!!!Welcome back to another week of weigh-in Wednesday. Share your +/- change from last Wednesday to this Wednesday, and a short summary of your week. Sometimes we get lost in the day to day ups and downs and it's good to see our week over week changes. Time to celebrate losses and lift each other up during possible failures. This is not a timed event or contest, feel free to jump in any time. This post was made a staple of r/loseit by u/Kahne_Fan and our thanks goes to him for providing a service that so many find helpful. [link] [comments] |
| Posted: 03 Mar 2021 12:40 AM PST I'm not sure if negative non-progress posts are allowed here but here goes. My weight fluctuates a lot in a year, and I end up somewhere between losing and gaining 15-30 pounds. I've noticed that my behaviour and personality tend to change a lot depending on where I am on my weight loss journey - when I'm at my lowest, I'm a social butterfly and love hanging out with people. When I start to gain weight, however, I cut myself off from everyone and stay holed up in my room because I'm scared of getting judged. I've gained some weight recently and I am completely unable to go outside at all or talk to people - I feel too self-conscious so I've been cancelling all my plans that involved going outside. I can't even go to the convenience store anymore. I know this might sound extreme but I was wondering if anyone's been going through the same thing as me. [link] [comments] |
| [Challenge] European Accountability Challenge: March 3rd, 2021 Posted: 02 Mar 2021 10:00 PM PST Hi team Euro accountability, I hope you're all well! For anyone new who wants to join today, this is a daily post where you can track your goals, keep yourself accountable, get support and have a chat with friendly people at times that are convenient for European time zones. Check-in daily, weekly, or whatever works best for you. It's never the wrong time to join! Anyone and everyone are welcome! Tell us about yourself and let's continue supporting each other. Let us know how your day is going, or, if you're checking in early, how your yesterday went! Share your victories, rants, problems, NSVs, SVs, we are here! I want to shortly also mention — this thread lives and breathes by people supporting each other :) so if you have some time, comment on the other posts! Show support, offer advice and share experiences! [link] [comments] |
| Posted: 02 Mar 2021 06:39 PM PST Alright so I should probably be posting on r/ownit but these cravings have gotten me to the point that I'm back here again. I'm 18M and I never craved sugar before even when I was obese I've kept this weight off for nearly a year but recently I've started craving it and I think I know the root cause but I'm not sire what to do from here. My mom recently had a surgery and now all she can eat is stuff like mashed potatoes and pudding and jello. My fridge is full of these and my mom has no problem with me eating them but I think that because I'm eating them I'm craving sugar and that is making me sluggish, unfocused, my body is getting softer and that's making me sadder so I turn to the pudding and the cycle continues. As of now, I may have gained 5-8 pounds! I'm the kind of guy who believes in the "out of sight, out of mind" philosophy but I can't throw out my mom's only source of food! Tonight is the lowest of the low points. I ate a jello, then I ate a large burger with fries for dinner, I had two pudding cups and then I went to the store to buy oreos and whole milk. I felt ashamed and guilty in line and I have never felt shame around food like that since before my weight loss. What the hell do I do? I can't go backward! [link] [comments] |
| Supernatural VR as a way to lose weight Posted: 02 Mar 2021 06:59 PM PST Hey everyone, first time poster here as I haven't lost a ton of weight or anything and only recently started working out again, but wanted to share my recent experiences getting back into it. I (26M) used to be in pretty good shape in college because I lifted a lot of weights, but never did any cardio. After college (and after being in a long term relationship for a few years, I lost a lot of the motivation to work out. I recently purchased an Oculus Quest 2 which is a VR headset, and my girlfriend downloaded the app "Supernatural." It's similar to bear saber if you've ever seen that, but is much more fitness focused and I absolutely love it. Not only do I not have to leave my apartment, but for the first time I look forward to working out because of how fun it is. It's also cool as shit being in various nature landscapes while you work out. My first thought about it is how perfect it is for the type of people that want to work out but have no experience, or are too shy to go to the gym. The downside is that it is a subscription based model similar to Peloton, but they are constantly uploading new content and workouts that range from low to high intensity, with many genres of music to choose (and you need the actual VR headset of course). Not really sure why I'm posting this, but if it helps one person get into working out then it was worth it. Hopefully I'll be back in a few months with some progress pics! [link] [comments] |
| Posted: 02 Mar 2021 03:47 PM PST In 2018 I was 35 and lost about 115lbs, getting down to 130 (then 35F, 5'5"). I lost it in a little under a year. But I fell off the wagon and I fell off hard. I struggle with depression and anxiety and some past trauma. Once I slipped up and began spiraling downward it didn't take long to completely revert to my former sedentary state. And once that began happening it just made me feel worse and lead to gaining more. I'm sure many if you know that cycle. I'm not sure of my current weight but I'm afraid to get on the scale and find out. I'm afraid I'll let the number I see discourage me. Rationally I know I shouldn't, but I know myself. So I think first I'd like to try to make some progress in bettering my lifestyle and getting back into better shape before I do that. And I started that Sunday, 3 days ago. I went for a mile run (aka slow jog) all 3 days, went on walks walks my 3yo daughter and played at the playground with her, today I roller skated a little bit. In 2018 I busted my butt and reached a point when I was running 5k 3-4 days a week. Reached the point when I could push myself to do 10k. I was into roller derby for a short time. I had never felt or looked better. I want to feel that way again. I want to feel proud of my run distances, of my ever improving 1 mile pace, I want to do a color run again and a zombie run for the first time (if these things even still exist in covid world). I want to be a good role model for a daughter, be the mom she deserves, a better partner to my SO. I want to feel good about myself again. I haven't in quite some time. I'm about about hit rock bottom if not already there. If I had to guess I'm probably at least 180+ lbs now but I'm really not sure. And I definitely lost a ton of muscle and replaced it with fat. I hate it and I'm angry at myself. So now I'm turning it around. It's time to fight through the depression, anxiety, and apathy again. And I guess that's why I'm here posting. This community helped me get there in 2018. I'm hoping coming back here and making this post will help keep me on track. So, here I am. Day 3 of getting my life back on track in a lot of aspects. Regaining my health and confidence is an important first step. I'm making efforts to eat better and more mindfully and I will exercise in some way ir another every day. Someone come kick my ass if I don't, lol. Wish I didn't need to lose it again, but happy to be back among such an awesome community :). [link] [comments] |
| I got diagnosed with - Pre diabetes !! Help please :/ Posted: 03 Mar 2021 12:35 AM PST I'm freaking out. I am 23 year old 5'7 and 270-280 pounds. I don't even feel bad nor did i ever experience any kind of pain that prompted me to go visit the doctor. I only went to the doctor to get a physical done for my job. However, come to my surprise i am pre-diabetic. I am wondering how i should go about this?? I'm starting to workout 1-1:30 hrs a day. Keeping track of my food. My doctor recommended that i start losing weight by exercising, cut red meat, minimal carbs, drink lots of water, and NO SWEETS/Sugar. I requested to see a nutritionist to talk about a meal plan but i have crappy insurance(medical) and who knows how long it will take before i can see one. Hence i have come to reddit to see what i can do about it? I'm thinking of going on a full keto diet. Just stick to white meat like chicken, turkey, fish etc. And really try hard on cutting down on carbs and sweets. Has anyone here successfully gotten out of pre-diabetes stage? if so how?? [link] [comments] |
| Daily Q&A Post for Wednesday, 03 March 2021 - No question too small! Posted: 02 Mar 2021 10:31 PM PST Got a question? We've got answers! Do you have question but don't want to make a whole post? That's fine. Ask right here! What is on your mind? Everyone is welcome to ask questions or provide answers. No question is too minor or small. TIPS: * Include your stats if appropriate/relevant (or better yet, update your flair!) * Check the FAQ and other resources in the sidebar! [link] [comments] |
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