Weight loss: My weight gain has killed my ability to have a healthy sex life. I need to change |
- My weight gain has killed my ability to have a healthy sex life. I need to change
- It took time for a plan to stick, but I weigh less today than the total number of pounds I’ve lost
- Update- Made a promise to myself post Covid
- I was 320 pounds - How I lost the weight.
- My weight loss camp starts today!
- I cancelled a date because I’m too ashamed of my weight.
- I lost 30lbs but now I have Body Dysmorphia (Phantom Fat)
- a tiny brag
- 24~ pounds down, 100+ to go.. But hey, at least it's something!
- Hit my weight loss goal this morning - I've lost 62lbs since January! [200lbs > 138lbs]
- Finding myself again
- My husband told me he’d be more attracted to me if I was skinnier
- My Mother keeps telling me that I’m too skinny
- Feel like I’m finally learning self discipline and getting control over binge eating
- Challenge] European Accountability Challenge: October 26th, 2020
- At my lowest adult weight (yay!) But vacation next week has me freaking out
- What do people MEAN when they say “you need to work on yourself to be happy, not just lose weight.” ?
- Rejected free pizza and chick-fil-a
- I've lost my way and feel so upset!
- Hit my first goal weight of 220 from 290.
- How do I develop the inner strength to get this done?
- SV/NSV Feats of the Day - Sunday, 25 October 2020: Today, I conquered!
- Worried about being on a diet for the rest of my life
| My weight gain has killed my ability to have a healthy sex life. I need to change Posted: 24 Oct 2020 04:04 PM PDT M/26/316lbs 5'9 So this is way too much information, but I needed to get this off my chest. I really started gaining weight towards the end of high school, but college is where the pounds really started adding up (that damn meal plan for 4 years). Back then, I had only dated one girl ever and she was pretty small so while being so heavy wasn't great, it wasn't an issue in basic performance. Since then I have dated some, but nothing really stuck and I haven't had sex with anyone. Until recently. Recently since moving to a larger city, I have had two hookups with girls I've taken out. The issue I've run into is that I can't seem to consistently get the right angle to get inside them. Because either I'm worried about throwing my weight on them or I can't see down there well enough with my stomach, I can't seem to get in and stay in. This is happened twice now. Thee first time, I assumed it was because I didn't get pillows under her and that she was also overweight. But last night, it happened again. We had a decent stretch then lost it. Then we tried getting her positioned right and it never worked. It kind of killed it for me. Luckily, she had a pretty good time, but its not sustainable. This one of the most motivating things to ever happen to me. I want to be able to normal and healthy sex/dating life. At my size, that just isn't possible. This past winter, I had some success with a CICO and walking a ton. I lost 35lbs in about 3 months. But covid hit, and I was working a super stressful job (preforming covid tests) and I gained it all back and 5 more. This is day 0 again. Lets get it. Edit: thanks for all the positive feedback. You all seem like a great community. Any one have any links to some basic weight lifting programs? changed a bit of wording. Also thanks for the awards. I was not expecting that! [link] [comments] |
| It took time for a plan to stick, but I weigh less today than the total number of pounds I’ve lost Posted: 24 Oct 2020 12:34 PM PDT I have been on this sub for probably six years or so and have even had moments when I posted my grand plans to finally commit to getting healthier/losing weight. I lost some weight, felt better, then gained it back plus some extra. Lasting change didn't come for me though until last year. A bunch of things changed for me in the middle of last year. I turned 38. This was significant to me because my older brother died of cancer just before he would've turned 38. When I turned 37, I kept waking up with this question: "what if this was your last year, are you living the life you want?" That question led me to make some big changes. I left an unhappy marriage, I tried to find ways to reduce stress and spend more time with family. When I turned 38, the question became "are you going to squander the time you've been given, more than your brother got, on being unhealthy?" I couldn't answer yes without feeling tremendous guilt and regret. So, after several months of tracking and doing my best to develop new food habits, I was inspired by my sister to give vegetarian keto and intermittent fasting a shot. It clicked immediately for me. I think my family tendency to have big blood sugar swings and poor insulin sensitivity is a huge part of why it works so well for me. I haven't looked back and last week I broke the "I've lost over half my total starting weight" mark. I weighed 520 when I started. As of this Monday, I'm down 264.9 pounds. It is surreal. And scary. And wonderful. And sometimes it feels just frustrating that I saddled myself down with weight for all those years. And I feel guilty that I've got this second chance when so many other people don't get that. It's a very complicated thing, food and weight and weight loss. Most days I'm proud and grateful for what I've learned and accomplished. I feel best on those days when I hear from someone who I helped inspire and how they've taken action and work on themselves in whatever way. I'm grateful to this sub and you who wrestle. Thank you for sharing your successes and your struggles. [link] [comments] |
| Update- Made a promise to myself post Covid Posted: 24 Oct 2020 05:25 PM PDT I caught Covid in late June and thought I was going to die and I made a promise to myself that I would get my shit together. Here we are close to four months later and I've lost 50.4 lbs! Not only that, but my partner got on the path with me, and he's lost 52 pounds! We want our weight loss to be forever, so we've made a lot of lifestyle changes. No soda, limited sugar, no alcohol, CICO. I'm vegan, but that's unrelated to weight loss. I initially focused on portion control, starting at 2400 calories and decreasing it gradually to where I am now at 1600. Once I felt like I had the diet situation on lock, I started focusing on moving more. I do 30-40 minutes of yoga a day (10 in the morning, 20-30 before bed) and keep workout clothes in my car to stop at the park on my way home. Mostly I just walk around, but I only do things that I enjoy because I've learned that if I don't like it, I'll find an excuse to not do it. I have a long way to go still, but I'm proud of myself. I'm so grateful to myself for getting my head on straight finally. Thank you to everyone who gave advice/ encouragement. You're all gems! [link] [comments] |
| I was 320 pounds - How I lost the weight. Posted: 24 Oct 2020 05:41 PM PDT Early Attempts at Health – 1995 When I was 15, I realized I weighed about 200 pounds. My Grandad also had a concern about his weight, and together we started a weight loss process that got me down to about 170 pounds. We drank non-fat milk, ate plain chicken breasts, and counted calories like they were collector's items. I ran cross country (albeit poorly), and got in reasonably good shape for my age. However, I didn't compete in any sports and lacked a real routine for fitness, with starts and stops here and there. Genetics were not on my side. Both of parents have struggled with weight throughout their lives (more on this later), but have both had periods of weight loss. High blood pressure was a common occurrence in my family. As a kid, I ate peanut butter sandwiches for lunch and dinner, with lots of fun pack chips, cheerios, kix, and, later on, home cooked meals. We had a limited amount of food for three growing kids. My idea of food and how to eat was skewed by the fact that friends had better access to food, but I didn't understand that they also had developed self-control. We ate fast food on the occasions where we could afford it, but many times it was just very basic foods like hot dogs in tortillas and small bags of chips and classic sugar-free popsicle flavors (think root beer, lime, and tangerine). Fast Food Worker – 1996 I started working at the local Arby's after my parents asked me to get a job to pay for my car insurance. It is important to note here that I had never had access to food of this type before. Arby's presented an unlimited amount of very-high calorie foods that were what is now referred to as superstimuli. Blessed with all the triple cheese melts, curly fries, and mozzarella sticks I could ask for at a below cost price, I began eating very differently. A friend invited me to work at Wendy's. Eating 10-20 mini frosties a night is a bit excessive. I began to gain even more weight. I left after only a few months and went back to Arby's, but looking back at the pictures, I was already overweight. I had little to no impulse control, and did things like eat 50 peppermints a day for a two to three week period. This was while still eating all the other food. My teeth suffered, and I began to suffer. By the time I left fast food to work for IBM in late 1998, I was well over 200 pounds. I began a battle with anxiety and depression, which mixed well with poor life choices. I kept eating poorly, often eating over 2000 calories in a single meal. I didn't understand my relationship with food and coping with the stress of being a young adult and dealing with young adult issues. I had no concept of self-control and ate what I wanted despite evidence that it was bad for me. Morbidly Obese – 2004  Eventually, I hit 320 pounds by the time I got married to my amazing wife in 2004. I have pictures of that time, and it looks painful. I couldn't wear normal clothes. I couldn't wear normal shoes, developing a habit of preferring flip-flops that I still have to this day. Somehow, I lost about 40 pounds, almost seemingly at random, only realizing this when my doctor told me on a routine visit. She compared the weight I had lost to carrying around a bad of cat litter all the time, then putting it down permanently. I hovered around 270 pounds for years. I would binge eat every night, plowing through a 5 ounce piece of cheese and a big bowl of tortilla chips after dinner. We had ice cream in the freezer. Our daughter was born in 2010, and I tried to change, but wasn't sure where to start. Trying to Lose Weight – 2010 I wanted to start losing weight, but didn't understand how. I tried all sorts of crazy diets. Keto, CICO (not insane), and various others. They didn't work because I couldn't maintain compliance. I didn't have the peer group that drove me to help myself. My mental state was not sufficient to maintain – I was weak. The suffering caused by calorie deprivation was a serious issue. I would have migraines that were exacerbated by my high blood pressure. The high blood pressure was exacerbated by stress. I would eat massive "healthy" snacks at work in an attempt to be healthier without any attempt at exercise. I started walking 10,000 steps a day with the early Fitbit, and climbing the stairs at work multiple times a day. My mom started her fitness journey around this time – losing most of the weight she had carried for years and working out daily – she almost became a fitness instructor! I am so proud of the effort and support she has provided over the years. Love you, Mom! Keto Diet – 2013 In 2014, I began a leadership training course at work that caused me to reconsider my life choices. I began seriously using a ketogenic diet to lose weight, and suffered through all the headaches and so-called keto flu. I lost 40 pounds and looked better than I had in years. My wife and I had a recommitment ceremony, and I still enjoy looking at the beautiful pictures on the wall from the event at our local community center. I started adding carbs back into my diet slowly, but I was going the diet alone. My Dad started losing weight around this time. He is still an inspiration to me and has kept slim for many years now. He walks every day, keeping his streak going. Unfortunately, adding carbs back in led to backsliding and resuming old behaviors. Relapse – 2015 I gained all of the weight back. I was stressed out at work and depressed, with my anxiety wreaking havoc on my life. I hit a low point around when my sister got married to her wonderful husband in September of 2016. I was morbidly obese, and had to wear extra wide shoes with my huge suit for their wedding. I still cringe at the bright neon green in the group picture from the wedding and remember having to discuss with them wearing the shoes to their ceremony. Vegan – 2016 We had gone to a full vegan diet after reading/watching How Not to Die by Michael Gregor, with its cherry-picked statistics about all-cause mortality and animal cruelty discussion. Our first real vegan meal was a kale and sweet potato slow-cooked soup. My body didn't know how to handle it and I got sick for a few days afterwards. The vegan diet didn't work because we found vegan junk food and didn't actually stick to the real, whole vegan food that would have led to weight loss and health benefits. Vegetarian and Hitting Bottom – 2016 We became vegetarians due to issues with trying to maintain strict compliance while eating at restaurants We added eggs, cheese, and milk to our diet. It was a relief to be able to enjoy dairy food again. The lowest point came on our Disneyland trip over Thanksgiving in 2016. I felt horrible, and was terrible to my wife and daughter. I didn't want to be there, as you can see in the photos from that trip. I spent time alone in our hotel room and bickered with my wife. It was a sad excuse for a family trip, and I deeply regret it now. I began to focus on losing weight, but in an unfocused manner. Somehow, I lost 20 pounds by the time Easter rolled around. Intermittent Fasting – 2017 With that much progress, I started researching intermittent fasting. I would only eat between the hours of 11a to 6p each evening. The weight started really coming off. By June of 2017, I weighed in around 200 pounds, a 70 pound loss. I was getting more fit and taking better care of myself. Surrounding myself with fit and strong people motivated me to be better with my eating and fitness. I started emulating my friends at the gym and it made me work harder to be more fit. Running and BJJ – 2017 I had also started running. I used the Couch-to-5k program, and worked my way up to running a 5k almost every day for a month or two. I started Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, prompted by Jocko Willink. Discipline equals freedom, he told me. I lost another 30 pounds in the first couple of months of getting the crap kicked out of me every day. It was a painful lesson, but I loved the process. A coach recommended that I start lifting weights before BJJ, so I did. I had to start eating in the morning due to the caloric demands of five-day-a-week BJJ and lifting. However, the weight started coming back on, and in December of 2018 I weighed about 190 pounds. I told people I was putting on muscle in exchange for fat. I'm really not sure if that was the case, but I was active and I ate what I wanted within reason. Over the next year, I ranged between 200-210 pounds. My wife was super supportive in the process, and began to lose weight as well. She's a trim 130 pounds nowadays and looks like a supermodel. Carnivore – 2019 After seeing all the hype from Dr. Shawn Baker and Dr. Peter Attila, I began eating the carnivore diet. I was attempting to check all the extreme diet boxes. I had lots of steak, fish, hamburger patties, and pork. Unsurprisingly, my cholesterol skyrocketed, completely against the internet wisdom that it would be normal. I did lose some weight, moving into the 195 pound range. Meanwhile, longtime meat-eaters at the gym began moving to vegan due to their cholesterol issues. Pescatarian and IF – 2020 March of 2020 greeted us with COVID-19 and severe meat shortages as everyone hoarded food and toilet paper. I had to switch to a vegetarian diet again. The weight almost immediately started coming off. I had to stop BJJ due to COVID, but started doing the Murphy Workout regularly. Then I started lifting weights again. I've had to adapt my routine to being at home without equipment. I've been between 170 and 175 pounds for months now, over 150 pounds lighter than I was 16 years ago. I slowly added fish back into my diet, eating catfish and tilapia. I've learned a lot of lessons over the years about how to care for myself and what my body needs to feel healthy. Current Routine My daily routine has changed over time to adapt to growing older and trying to stay healthy: I fast until 11a – walking about 6000 steps first thing in the morning I've started running a 5k each morning after I cook breakfast for my girls I have a green smoothie for lunch, inspired by Scott Jurek, and some sort of cheese toast or similar I'll have a snack of fruit and nuts in the afternoon I walk on a desk treadmill during all work conference calls and throughout the day – I walk at least 20,000 steps every day 4 days a week I use Mark Wildman's kettlebell routines I stop eating at 6p each night Sample Meals for a Day – Late 2020 Breakfast – None, I fast until 11a each day Lunch – Green smoothie Protein powder ½ banana 1 date Broccoli Kale Spiralina Nutritional yeast Blueberries Frozen Fruit Cheese toast or leftovers from dinner and some dark chocolate Snack – Apple and nuts (pistachios, walnuts, pecans, or cashews) Dinner – A solid vegetarian meal Veggie burgers and baked fries Oatmeal and potatoes Buddha bowls "Jesus" bowl Veggie burritos Final Thoughts – October 2020 I'm not going to be a model. I have loose skin everywhere, my face has sagged without all the fat holding it up. But I can run 5k fasted at a better time than I could 3 years ago. I've run 10ks. I've walked 120+ miles a week for weeks in a row walking 6-10 hours a day. I feel better than I have in my whole life, even on bad days. It's been an interesting journey. Why I Wrote This I see others struggling with weight, and emotional issues. I'd like to help other people out, and that's part of why I am sharing my story here. I don't have all the answers, and I can only talk about what worked for me. Please feel free to reach out if you have any questions, and I will do my best to provide support or tell you what I have done to get to where I am now. Disclaimer: I am not a dietician, nor a doctor – just a guy who lost a bunch of weight and have kept it off for several years. This is not medical advice, but I am happy to share my experiences [link] [comments] |
| My weight loss camp starts today! Posted: 24 Oct 2020 06:34 PM PDT well, technically tomorrow, but I'm already in the building I'll be staying at for the next few months, and I'm going to bed after posting this. The other technicality is that it's not an official camp. It's a one person camp just for me, and the supervisor is my dad. We're staying in his old office for 2-3 months and I'll only be eating healthy foods in healthy quantities. I'll also be barred from my computer and laziest of habits so that I learn to develop more active ones. Basically the goal is to adjust to a new lifestyle rather than lose weight (though I'm sure that will be part of it) and I'm really hoping this is effective. I'm at 470 pounds right now, so I really need to have a plan that'll stick with me, and this seems to be one of the more...potent methods of getting adjusted. Wish me luck, and if you have any tips or fun activities I can start participating in at my weight, I'd love to hear! [link] [comments] |
| I cancelled a date because I’m too ashamed of my weight. Posted: 24 Oct 2020 07:49 PM PDT Classic story of pandemic hit and I piled on the pounds. I'm now the heaviest I've ever been. I'm unhappy with how I look and just can't comprehend how someone else could. Before lockdown, I was at the gym regularly. I had weekly PT sessions and I actually ran a half marathon in March. When lockdown hit, my PT dropped off the face of the earth and was unreachable. I was stranded, abandoned and alone. Bad habits became regular habits. I was redeployed to the wards for COVID cover and the only food I saw was hospital food. Now lockdown has been eased and gyms are open again, I decided not to go back to my old PT or gym. I signed up to CrossFit but as my shifts are 12.5hrs and 4+/- a week, it's become a chore to get booked in due to my shift patterns. Like everyone else who may be single, I've decided to dabble with online dating again. Previously, I could take it or leave it. I've had some success, including the offer of a date earlier today. I was excited and then terrified. I didn't want to go. Not because of date nerves but more because I wasn't comfortable getting dressed up to meet someone for the first time, whilst I'm at my heaviest. I've vowed that I can't keep living my life this way. I'm not happy and actively avoiding things that could be good for me has been the final nail in the coffin. I've booked the gym for this week (around my shifts) and vowed to eat my own meals/ food prep to eat better. It's the start of taking back control of my life. TL;DR: was invited on a date for the first time in a while. Actively avoided and cancelled due to feeling too self-conscious about my weight being the heaviest I've ever been. It's the wake up call I need to get my life back together! [link] [comments] |
| I lost 30lbs but now I have Body Dysmorphia (Phantom Fat) Posted: 24 Oct 2020 09:58 PM PDT I really just need a place to vent right now. I want to be happy for myself and celebrate the progress, consistency and changes that have gotten my body to where it is now. But I'M NOT.. instead I'm home, crying in bed, with a messy pile of clothes that no longer fit. It's truly one of the strangest paradoxes I've experienced. My brain is so confused. When I wake up in the morning I still feel like the size 18/20 person. I put on my size 14 jeans and feel like they're not gonna fit, every single time. I'm swimming in my work shirts and people tell me I'm looking small, but looking in the mirror I can't tell at all. I tend to be a logical person, but I'm just having a hard time getting my brain to work with me on this. I did some research and learned about this type of body dysmorphia/phantom fat (I'm aware of this term as I'm queer, identify as non-binary and have dated trans folk) but I didn't know it was something that typically occurred with weight loss. I can look back and measure my progress through the physical milestones I've made. I'm mainly worried for my mental health at this point. Through the pandemic I've honed in on working through traumas, but this came out of nowhere and hit me like a driver getting t-boned in an intersection. I hope this feeling goes away soon and I can eventually feel proud of my success. [link] [comments] |
| Posted: 24 Oct 2020 12:17 PM PDT When I had my "something's gotta change" moment back in August, all of the gyms were closed and so I decided to try running (again) in the hopes that this time it might click and I might someday be one of the people who enjoys running. I ran every other day for three weeks and had worked up to a slow 5 k when disaster struck in the first week of September. I bailed hard and sprained my ankle badly enough that it bruised from half-way up my calf all the way to my toes. Two weeks later I started again with a very slow 2 km, and I've been working my way back since then. Today I ran my personal best time for a 5 k ever. (Still slow at 37 minutes, but so much faster than I've ever been before, even when I wasn't 40 lbs overweight.) Even better, there was a 5 minute period in the middle where I felt UNSTOPPABLE. I felt fast and strong and happy. I was actually smiling. Have you ever seen a runner smiling? I thought it was a thing that only happened in tampon commercials. I read books with characters who love to run - who find peace and quiet joy in the time they spend running, and I've always envied that. Today I feel like it's actually possible that someday I might be one of them. [link] [comments] |
| 24~ pounds down, 100+ to go.. But hey, at least it's something! Posted: 24 Oct 2020 10:44 AM PDT I weighed in, two months ago on August 17, 2020, and 297.6 pounds. I was horrified at the fact I was so heavy, despite me not "looking" my weight. Doesn't matter if I "looked" that big or not. What matters is that I was actually that weight. I'm currently on my cycle, and I was scared to step on the scale. I had been eating.. Not the best (burger king's impossible whoppers are my weakness atm). Last week I was at 275.3. Today.. Today I was 272.8! I know I'm still grossly overweight, and that I have a long way to go, but I'm just happy that I've lost 24~ pounds! I've made it to goal weight one (290) and goal weight two (280) and I'm almost at my third goal weight! My fourth goal weight is 260, and my fifth is a HUGE leap at 200. I can't wait until I make it there! [link] [comments] |
| Hit my weight loss goal this morning - I've lost 62lbs since January! [200lbs > 138lbs] Posted: 24 Oct 2020 03:54 AM PDT Long time lurker, first time poster! I (F, 5ft7) hit my weight loss goal this morning and I couldn't be happier! I did CICO through bereavement, grad school, and a global pandemic, so I'm celebrating today. Some things that helped me:
Good luck to you all on this journey! If I can do it, anyone can. I believe in you! [link] [comments] |
| Posted: 24 Oct 2020 06:47 PM PDT First time posting here, but I want to share this whether anyone reads it or not. I got divorced in 2012, and I couldn't see past it. I thought my life had been set: I had a wife, a house, the dog and the fenced in yard. Then it was over. I moved away to the city, and started working in a restaurant downtown. I embraced the night life that comes along with the service industry. I really dug into it. Over the next 4 and a half years, I was set on drinking myself to death. I was severely depressed, and had no way of coping. I kept gaining weight. I was about 225 lbs at 5'10", I know that's not an extremely high weight but I hated looking in the mirror so to me it was. It got to the point that I hated myself enough that one day the thought entered my mind, "It'd be so much better if I were dead." I scoffed at myself and jokingly prayed to God saying, "You like to fix things that are broken, well why not me." Some days later, I had a spiritual experience. Call it what you want, but I went from drinking a case or more of beer a day to nothing, cold turkey along with cigarettes and any other vice. On December 9, 2017 I went to a sporting goods store and bought a pair of shorts and a sweatshirt as I had nothing suitable to wear to a gym. I signed up at a Workout Anytime. I ran half of a mile on the tred and lifted some weights that night. Left, got some protein, and started repeating this almost daily (6 days a week for the first few months). As I started to see myself change, I started to gain respect for myself. I loved going to the gym, but it wasn't long before I realized that there was something different to me about running. I was fully invested: diet, gym, attitude, habits, and the run. It was the day after my birthday later that month that I ran 7 miles without stopping for the first time. I never thought I could do that. That was day running revealed to me its greatest gift. It taught me I was more than I ever thought I was. From here everything snowballed. I ran 800 miles each of the next two years, while still maintaining a good diet and some gym time. But what was most incredible is that it changed everything about me. I went from someone who was supremely negative and hated himself enough to imagine being dead as a release; to a positive, motivated, confident individual who for the first time in life felt great about who he was. In turn, I noticed others treating me differently as well. It was the best two years of my life. Everything was great. Every aspect of my life had been infected by the positive effects of running. Then last October, I had a depressive episode begin. I have MDD and generalized anxiety, but it had all but disappeared the last two years. I've struggled with it now for over a year. Despite not changing much in my diet or habits I gained weight. Once again I saw the old me in the mirror. It has broke my heart over and over to see that version of myself again, inside and out. Confidence dissipated and self loathing was its replacement. BUT, I knew that along with therapy and a commitment to myself, if I kept running it could impact me positively again. So I've done just that. There have been a few gaps and unexpected set backs throughout the year, but I've kept starting over. Tonight I went for a run and this has nothing to do with how far or what my time was, but I felt like me again. The moral of the story is this... There are few things in life that are truly dependable, but running to me is one of those things. You always get out what you put in. It will not cheat you. It will not let you down. If you commit to it, and keep going it will change you for the better. I'm not out of the woods yet, and will continue with therapy and investing in myself by doing the things I know will build happiness and positivity in my life. I will not stop running as long as God allows me. I hope that this has helped someone or at least been of use. Nonetheless, it was good for me just to write it out. Feeling very hopeful and thankful tonight. Thanks for reading. God bless. Be safe. Wear a mask. Please vote. Ridin' with Biden 2020 [link] [comments] |
| My husband told me he’d be more attracted to me if I was skinnier Posted: 24 Oct 2020 10:52 AM PDT Here to vent folks. I was at my lowest weight when I met my husband. About 190. Fast forward and I've gained about 30 lbs. I take responsibility for that, but he also doesn't keep snacks out of the house and rarely exercises with me. I've made both requests when he asks how he can help me when I tell him I wanted to get serious about getting back in shape. Is it ultimately up to me if I eat those snacks and still exercise? Yes. I'm not blaming him for that, but it's frustrating when I tell him it makes it difficult for me and he shows no support. When I lost weight the first go round it was by keeping junk out of the house completely. He's one of those lucky people that just doesn't feel hungry and can skip meals, I wake up ravenous and am pretty much hungry at least every two hours. It's disheartening when you're trying so hard and someone else can do it without any effort. About two weeks ago I seriously started back up with cico and working out 5 days a week. I felt great this week, I had so much more energy and was excited to get back into an exercise regime. I've already lost a couple pounds as well which is always helpful motivation. Last night, my husband told me he would be more attracted to me if I was skinnier. I'm not going to pretend it hadn't been on the back of my mind for a year now, based on his level of intimacy(which I've brought on many occasions), but damn. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't absolutely crushed. On the one hand, I can objectively process this and understand that someone healthier would be more attractive to a man. But it sure hurts like hell when it's about you and coming from the person that's supposed to love you most. It's also humiliating thinking you've been intimate with this person during this time and they didn't like your body. I don't even want to change around him now. Maybe I wouldn't be so upset (yeah, who am I kidding), if he had at least been supportive throughout my continued struggles with weight loss. I feel so horrible about myself right now. I want to keep losing weight to be healthier, but the self talk right now is not pretty. It's been a quick shift from doing this to empower myself to hating my body and feeling like I don't deserve food. I know that's not a good place to be or mindset to have but here we are. [link] [comments] |
| My Mother keeps telling me that I’m too skinny Posted: 24 Oct 2020 05:11 PM PDT I'm 18, F 142. I've lost over 30 lbs so I was 180 earlier this year. I've been able to maintain my weight loss with intermittent fasting, smaller portion sizes, and exercise. I'm almost at a normal BMI, but the issue right now is my mother. Every week is the same crap. "You're too small" "You'll faint" "You look sick" It hurts me so much because it makes me feel a bit insecure. My mom also does this to my little sister who is also at a normal weight. I mean, how could I be getting too small? My stomach is now beginning to flatten, which means this weight is perfect for me. However, she never fails to remind me how "unsexy" I am. I remember her saying something along the lines of how "this weight loss doesn't fit your body type" You could say I have a proportionate body and curves, which have become a bit smaller as I lost weight, but that's normal. I feel so healthy like this and my periods have become very regular. She's so toxic I feel, because when I was larger, she would purposefully never tell me to lose weight, and consistently feed me large portions. Now, its an issue that I'm smaller. She even said that if I ever fainted she wouldn't care and leave me to die because she told me so. How do I overcome this? I feel like my body is terrible because of this constant body and emotional shaming [link] [comments] |
| Feel like I’m finally learning self discipline and getting control over binge eating Posted: 24 Oct 2020 06:40 PM PDT I'm currently 10lbs down in just over a month (aiming for a slow and steady weight loss of 2lbs a week. Currently 218lbs and my goal weight is around 140lbs so I have a long way to go. It dawned on me today that I am finally leaning to discipline myself not to eat at the faintest stirrings of hunger. Same with binge eating - firstly I don't buy trigger foods any more (high fat, greasy, sugary foods) and if I do buy some lower calorie treats, I'll be strict and have one or two as opposed to just mindlessly eating the whole packet or box. I can finally have 'treat' foods in the cupboard or fridge for more than a day. It sounds crazy but it's compulsion I haven't bothered to resist for such a long time. I think the turning point is slowly educating myself about calories and CICO. Now, when I'm at the supermarket, if I see a treat food and I really want to buy it, I'll look at the nutritional info and I can see how it's not worth it. 2 mins of eating for 300 calories? I'll pass thanks. That being said, I will allow myself the odd treat but I'll factor it into my calories for the day/week. I feel like I'm taking a much more sustainable approach and this really feels like something I can stick to for once! Just so pleased to have mustered some control over my eating habits again! [link] [comments] |
| Challenge] European Accountability Challenge: October 26th, 2020 Posted: 24 Oct 2020 11:26 PM PDT Hi team Euro accountability, I hope you're all well! For anyone new who wants to join today, this is a daily post where you can track your goals, keep yourself accountable, get support and have a chat with friendly people at times that are convenient for European time zones. Check-in daily, weekly, or whatever works best for you. It's never the wrong time to join! Anyone and everyone are welcome! Tell us about yourself and let's continue supporting each other. Let us know how your day is going, or, if you're checking in early, how your yesterday went! Share your victories, rants, problems, NSVs, SVs, we are here! I want to shortly also mention — this thread lives and breathes by people supporting each other :) so if you have some time, comment on the other posts! Show support, offer advice and share experiences! [link] [comments] |
| At my lowest adult weight (yay!) But vacation next week has me freaking out Posted: 24 Oct 2020 05:55 PM PDT From 240 to 208 during the lockdown. I'm pumped about all my hard work and feel more motivated than ever - but! Next week I'll be on vacation with my family and I can't stop overthinking it. I have done a good job of moving past my binging habits and very rarely over eat, even when I'm hit with one of my most "triggering" moments. I very rarely drink. But I still feel a big mental block with this idea that I'm going to go on vacation and blow it and come back home having some how gained 20 pounds. I can't shake it and it has me nervous about losing this progress. I'm the one buying the food and will be doing most of the cooking. There are no worries about excessive quantities of my favorite junk food. And my kids help ensure that some kind of normal schedule must be kept, so it's not like I can just laze around mindlessly stuffing my face. But but but..... What can I do to get these ideas out of my head? [link] [comments] |
| Posted: 24 Oct 2020 01:31 PM PDT I've lost 51lbs now with another 24 to go until my current goal. My self esteem is rubbish, I can't let go of the feeling of shame I have at my weight and body. I can't celebrate my milestones because I just feel ashamed that I had to lose that weight to begin with. I'm just waiting, willing time to go by impatiently until I reach my goal weight. I'm worried my hard work will be all for nothing if my self esteem issues persist. The weight part has been fairly straightforward, I don't know how to change the rest though. I totally understand that "working on myself" is necessary here, but I have NO idea what that means. How do people do that? Is there a step by step? People talk all the time about the "work" they've put into their body confidence but it just seems so abstract and confusing to me. So yeah, if anybody knows the big secret please let me in on it. I'd really appreciate it! EDIT: I've typed out loads of rambling replies to people and deleted them, and I apologise if the ones I do post are all over the place. I don't talk about personal issues to anyone very often and I'm having a slight explosion of worries and thoughts! Bear with me please and thank you for your helpful words. [link] [comments] |
| Rejected free pizza and chick-fil-a Posted: 24 Oct 2020 04:12 AM PDT For the first time ever after a HS football game (I'm the color guard director for our band), I rejected free leftover pizza and chick-fil-a sandwiches being shoved toward my face three separate times by our band parents running concessions, while my stomach was growling. I kept thinking to myself, 'you already ate your chicken, carrots, and potatoes before the game! You've already eaten! You don't need free food! Etc.' lol This is my first Reddit post ever, 5'11" 25F, SW: 264, CW: 208, GW: 175 down 56 lbs. I just got my head back in the game a couple of weeks ago after maintaining -50 lbs for five months and have lost 6 pounds so far. I purposely binge in secret every once in a blue moon (considering therapy for mental wellness anyway). I've always "loved" food in large quantities so I'm simply proud of myself for saying no to 2 of my favorite cheat foods. I'm just dropping in here to say it truly is mind over matter. You can beat those gnawing late night cravings. You can go to bed hungry. You can say no to free food, whatever sugary crap it may be. I like the feeling of my stomach lying a bit flatter in the mornings more than the 2 minutes of satisfaction I'd feel whilst clogging my arteries. And at 10 PM? For what? Literally only for worsening my overall health. Absolutely not. YOU CAN DO IT. Anyway, thanks for reading! [link] [comments] |
| I've lost my way and feel so upset! Posted: 25 Oct 2020 12:34 AM PDT I've been on my weight loss journey since May now and I totally can't get back on the wagon. I started counting when I was 250lb (I was bigger but that was when I actually got on the scales) I am not down to 215lb but I have been the same weight now for over a month. I'm struggling to control my binge eating at least once a week. I have just reduced my cals to 1600 instead of 1800. I start by using MFP but "forget" to put in my cals when I go off track. I'm trying to walk 10k steps but I'm not. I know all this is my fault and I should get back to rigidly calorie counting and walking but to be honest I feel utterly depressed. I'm 35, fat, single, childless and about to be made redundant. I barely see my friends as they have families so on the nights instead I just eat, eat, drink alcohol then eat again. I'm not sure why I've wrote this out, I just feel like I need to get my feelings down and maybe then it will help me give my head a shake to get back on track. That's the hope anyway. [link] [comments] |
| Hit my first goal weight of 220 from 290. Posted: 24 Oct 2020 07:20 AM PDT This is my first post here, I've been following this sub since my journey started on my 25th birthday ( three months ago). I woke up on my 25th birthday the heaviest I've ever been, looked at my 6 month old daughter and said to myself something has to change. I was scared my health would deteriorate to the point where I couldn't chase her around the yard, or that I'd end up a diabetic ( it runs in my family). That day I decided to make a change. I started calorie counting and working out at the gym almost everyday. This morning I woke up to see that magic number I've been waiting for. I've had many cheat days, and many days where I wanted to go to the store and get a case of beer and my favorite bag of chips, but some how I kept pushing through. All of you wonderful people have inspired me along the way. I think its important to feel like your not running up the mountain that is weight loss alone. I've still got some work left to do, but I'm feeling confident and better than ever. To all who are also on this journey, you can do it, we can do it. Stay strong and much love to yall. Sorry for the wall of text. [link] [comments] |
| How do I develop the inner strength to get this done? Posted: 24 Oct 2020 09:48 PM PDT F/42/?350? I've always been big, and have lost and gained up to 100 pounds at a time. I want to get my shit sorted. I need to get my shit sorted. Body is starting to hurt just doing basic stuff, and my self esteem is at an all time low. I know what I need to do, and I know how to do it, I just can't get beyond a day or two, then I just seem to lose the will to care and binge eat. I need so help to get going, I know if I can get through the first few weeks, I can keep going, but I can't even manage to string together a few days, really starting to hate myself. Any tips would be greatly appreciated. [link] [comments] |
| SV/NSV Feats of the Day - Sunday, 25 October 2020: Today, I conquered! Posted: 25 Oct 2020 01:08 AM PDT The habit of persistence is the habit of victory!Celebrating something great? Scale Victory, Non-Scale Victory, Progress, Milestones -- this is the place! Big or small, long or short, please post here and help us focus all of today's awesomeness into an inspiring and informative mega-dose of greatness! (Details are appreciated!! How are you losing your weight?)
Post it here! This is the new, improved place for recording your acts of awesomeness! Due to space limitations, this may be an announcement (sticky) only occasionally. Please find it daily and keep it the hottest thing on /r/loseit! On reddit your vote means, "I found this interesting!" Help us make this daily post the most read, most used, most interesting post on /r/loseit by reading, commenting, and participating often! [link] [comments] |
| Worried about being on a diet for the rest of my life Posted: 24 Oct 2020 03:22 PM PDT Hi All, I'm middle aged and my weight has been creeping up over the last number of years so I now could stand to lose about 75 lbs. I don't find people treat me poorly for being overweight, in fact I sometimes enjoy being "matronly" and think it makes some relationships easier. Also, while I could be in much better shape, I can still walk up several flights of stairs without issue. But now I find I am having some health issues that are worsened by being overweight, so I am toying with the idea of trying to lose weight. The part the scares me, is that if I set my mind to losing weight and keeping it off, I worry that I will never be free again. Every day or at least every other day will be weighing myself. And every meal I will be thinking about calories/nutrients/fiber, etc. My choices seem to be have my weight creep up slowly with gradually worsening health effects or track my meals every meal, every day for the rest of my life. Can anyone give me some insights or advice to make this seem less all-consuming and scary? [link] [comments] |
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